i’m quitting tomorrow

Ok, I’m really not, but sometimes it goes through my head. Never seriously, but about every other day the thought flies through my mind. It’s more something just to ponder, to laugh at, and then quickly push out of my mind.

At the end of my day you could find me…

a) picking up leftover wrappers or crumbs from the floor from 8th-10th grade students who haven’t figured out how to pick up after themselves

b) staying late tutoring one of the students who really really wants to get it right (I love these days)

c) talking to a student in the hall, explaining to them how their behavior was unacceptable that day (usually followed by a call to their parents)

d) throwing all my stuff on my desk and rushing out the door because I don’t want to stay late for the 10th day in a row

e) talking to parents, copying things, collecting things, finding students extra paper/folders/binders/etc or any other variety of running around the Christopher House

My job? I love it. The students? I love them, too. But like most people who love their students and love what they are trying to do (get them into college in a few years), sometimes we would rather just take a day off, quit for a bit, or just come to work and not actually work for the day. We get sick of being let down, complained to, insulted, and lied to. We get sick of spending our days trying to keep students behavior in check and rarely getting chances to really do something good. We get sick of hearing our own loud voice, of calling out students’ names, of telling people to “sit down” or “do not leave” or “pleassssssssssssssssse take out your homework”. We wish we could have just one day when we didn’t have to fight students and instead just worked with them. (Just one day, God, one day.)

I love my job because it is so freaking hard. I love my job because it pushes me. I love my job because the students are amazing.

And then some days I just don’t want to show up again for the next.

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